Old Monk vs Captain Morgan

Welcome to my blog, a sacred space where I bestow upon the world ideas unfiltered by rational thought or empathy. I only accept statements of uncritical adulation in the designated comments section, which is why you’ll find them empty. If you like alcohol, video games, barbecues, and right-wing conspiracy theories, you’ll find yourself sufficiently entertained. If you’re a reader, please do not attempt to contact me.

The latest

While spending countless hours of your life digging for 8-bit minerals isn’t most people’s idea of fun, given enough time, Minecraft may just prove to be the most enthralling experience imaginable.

Like every rational person, the thought of a slimy bureaucrat in Bihar rummaging through my meme collection causes me considerable angst; which is why I switched to the Nokia 3310. But how is it for daily use?

If you think slaughtering waves of cultists with a star-spangled baseball bat alongside a diabetic grizzly bear named Cheeseburger sounds like a good way to spend a Saturday afternoon; Far Cry 5 is definitely for you.

Do those funny looking dudes on the pyramids come from the imagination of an intoxicated scribe; or do they depict beings from out of this world? Author Erich von Däniken has a crazy explanation…

Some would say that Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas is perfection, but they clearly haven’t tried out Copland; a mod that’ll bring in submarines, F-1 race cars, and a whole goddamn island…

Some would call it a cliche gangster story, others would say it’s GTA 4, with better looking cars. Maybe it’s a bit of both, but one thing’s certain; Mafia 2 is still one of the most gorgeous games ever made.

Our proud nation has produced many impeccable beers; as well as Bira. But are any of them truly a viable supplement to Kingfisher? Today, I will uncover the truth; and get very drunk in the process.

No Man’s Sky is the most ambitious game ever made. With more than a trillion planets stretched across an entire galaxy, this game is the ultimate sandbox for exploration. But is it any fun?

If harvesting blueberries & getting metal dinosaurs to fight to the death appeals to you as a human being; Ark: Survival Evolved just might have something to offer…

Few debates inspire as much passion & acts of violence as Old Monk Vs. Captain Morgan. Though many have ruminated the answer, today I, using the scientific method, will come to a verdict…

COMING SOON

The Body Electric

Book Review | The Body Electric

Is there some truth to the 5G ‘conspiracy theories flaring up around the world? This 1985 book, written by a US Army surgeon explores the cause and effects of electromagnetic frequencies in the human body.

Sheek Kebab

Barbecues | The Unintentional Arsonist's Guide​

The most fun thing about barbecues is without a doubt, the logistics. If you’re planning to organise a cookout, and don’t want to burn down your entire suburb, then heed my advice… 

The Witcher 3 | High Fantasy Isn't Just For Creeps

Whether you enjoy hunting ferocious monsters, slaying ruthless bandits, bedding beautiful women, or playing cards with illiterate farmers; The Witcher 3 may just have a little something for you to waste your life on.

World Of Tanks Blitz | An Alternative To Therapy?​

As far as the after effects of deep personal tragedies go, finding yourself addicted to a Belarusian MMO isn’t necessarily the worst thing that can happen to you. But how good is World Of Tanks, objectively speaking?